Week 0: Introduction

[flipflop_diva]

Who am I?

That’s the question. It should be easy, but yet it’s really not.

I’m Kristine. I’m a Hufflepuff. With a bit of Slytherin in there. (If you know Harry Potter, that tells you a lot.) I’m a daughter, and a sister, and an aunt. I call myself a mom, but my only kids have four legs and are furry.

I’m 38. I’m supposed to be an adult. Sometimes I am. I live by myself and pay the mortgage and go on business trips. I have a gardener and worry about things like electric bills and oil changes. At work, they let me be in charge of other people.

I don’t feel like an adult very much, though. I sit around in my pajamas on a daily basis until 5pm (I work at home), I watch too much TV (and record even more of it), I write smutty fanfic and squee over celebrities.

There are dishes in the sink and laundry is on the floor and there’s a stack of mail on the table next to me that desperately needs to be opened.

This isn’t how I pictured being an adult.

When I was a kid, I thought when I’d get older, I’d have everything figured out. I thought I’d be a world famous author and have a gorgeous husband and three flaw-free kids.

I have none of those things. I’m not even close to having any of those things.

Sometimes I wonder if the kid I was back then would recognize the me I am today. I’m not sure. Though some things are still the same.

I’m still a writer. I’m still a dreamer. I’m still an optimist. I still love everything Disney and would live at Disneyland if that were an option.

Some things are different. I left California for Texas. I switched from pop music to country. I’m braver than I used to be. I’m stronger than I used to be. I’m more outgoing than I use to be.

Some days I’m proud of myself for who I’ve become. Other days I disappoint myself. Then I go to bed and get up in the morning and try to be better.

I’m a procrastinator. I’m a perfectionist. Some days I’m a hard worker. Other days I’m lazy.

I’m a writer. A hockey player. A Texas Longhorns college football fan.

I love drinking beer and eating Mexican food and hanging out with my friends online and offline. I spend way too much time on the internet when I should be cleaning the kitchen. I spend way too much time flailing over TV characters when I could be out changing the world.

But this is who I am. Right now anyway.

Who I want to be, who I’m meant to be … I’m still figuring that out.

Comments

[similiesslip.livejournal.com]

Wow, the details of our lives are different but I recognize a lot of your feelings as my own, especially this part: "
Some days I’m proud of myself for who I’ve become. Other days I disappoint myself. Then I go to bed and get up in the morning and try to be better."

Hugs! I guess someday we will both find our way, right? :)

[rosy-nic.livejournal.com]

I still think we don't grow up in someways :) :)

[amberdawnpullin.livejournal.com]

"Who I want to be, who I’m meant to be … I’m still figuring that out."

You and me both!

Great intro.

[sra33.livejournal.com]

Hello!! Fellow Hufflepuff here! ^^ Although I'm more gryffinpuff and can get on the nerves of slytherpuffs so I might just back away slowly now... >.>

Nice to meet you! :)

[thegreylioness.livejournal.com]

living at Disneyland would be cool.

[mmailliw.livejournal.com]

*smiles that you FINALLY own up to your Slytherin side*

and I'm looking forward to reading more!

[samantha.livejournal.com]

Kristine, Avi, & me are basically a Slytherpuff OT3 rn

[kajel.livejournal.com]

Lovely!
Some days I’m proud of myself for who I’ve become. Other days I disappoint myself. Then I go to bed and get up in the morning and try to be better. I especially loved this.

[colls]

We seem to have so much in common from the "I'm supposed to be an adult" to the "work from home in my pajamas" and especially the "dishes in the sink and laundry is on the floor and there’s a stack of mail on the table next to me that desperately needs to be opened"

Some days I’m a hard worker. Other days I’m lazy.
yup. we're twins.

I'm convinced that the biggest difference between is that my mail is on the kitchen counter.

[sarcasmoqueen.livejournal.com]

I can totally relate to this entry. Looking forward to reading more!

[samantha.livejournal.com]

I love youuuu<3333333
I can relate to this whole post (not surprising ofc) - I really cannot wait to hang out in the fall :D

[lyssa027.livejournal.com]

No matter how long I live in Texas... I will never submit to country

[c-hrista.livejournal.com]

I love everything about how you are.

[cheshire23.livejournal.com]

This whole "BE AN ADULT" thing is such a scam, isn't it? :/

[kagomeshuko.livejournal.com]

my intro entry is kind of in the same vein as this one, so of course, I love it.

[shay-writes.livejournal.com]

I understand. I liked your introduction!

[gratefuladdict.livejournal.com]

On the rare day I do work from home, I stay in my PJ's, too.

[scatteredintime.livejournal.com]

There's no point in putting on proper clothes unless I'm leaving the house, tbh. >.> I can sympathise with a lot of things you've said. I may not be in my 30s yet, but boy I did not picture adulthood as a constant state of self-doubt, anxiety and procrastination. I'm jealous of all the people who can fake it enough to make it seem like they've got everything under control.

(P.S. Adults are like cake. They are a lie.)

[tsuki-no-bara.livejournal.com]

i'm a bit older than you and i don't always feel like an adult either. (witness the total lack of capital letters. a holdover from college when i first acquired an email account and realized i could type a lot faster if i didn't use them.) here's to still trying to figure it out. *raises glass*

[jenandbronze.livejournal.com]

I think we all struggle to find ourselves. I'm a single woman and some days I stay in my PJs and I work from home a fair bit, ... I can be lazy and sometimes I work hard... I never procrastinate though, but I am a perfectionist (which I got from my mother!).

Good luck to you and look forward to more entries from you this season!

[favoritebean.livejournal.com]

It's nice to meet you. I look forward to reading more from you.

[whipchick.livejournal.com]

"At work, they let me be in charge of other people." I totally feel you on that :)

[halfshellvenus.livejournal.com]

I think many of us are not quite who we expected to be, as grownups. And most of the time, that's also okay.

We find ourselves, not the paper dolls someone else set out to move through a dull, worn-out story.

[ohelectricshock.livejournal.com]

I remember when I went to Disneyland when I was 18 and I cried over every little thing. I cried when I saw little kids meeting Disney characters for the first time, when the voice narrating the fireworks told me that dreams really do come true, when a couple got engaged during the Peter Pan ride and they got to go on another spin on it. I think it's that sense of childlike wonder that gets me every time. I would totally also live in Disneyland if I could :)

Also, I get the same way with TV shows and their characters. Actually, I frequently converse with them while I watch the shows because I assume they are my friends and can hear me, or something equally weird.

Looking forward to reading more from you :) I think we have a fair amount in common.

[jem0000000.livejournal.com]

Welcome to LJI. :)

[pianogurl330.livejournal.com]

♥